I told her of my secret studies, designed to fit me for
companionship with her; of my withdrawing with her into the wilderness,
that her grief might be alleviated in the inspiring presence of
uncontaminated nature; of my expenditures to gratify her wishes and
tastes. I narrated the incidents which preceded the duel, and informed
her that I was perfectly acquainted with Sefton's object in seeking an
encounter with me; that I gratified him because willing to undertake
every hazard for her sake. Finally, I avowed my knowledge of all the
disappointment her heart had experienced by Frank's inconstancy.' know
you feel, to-night,' I said, 'that existence is an imposture--worse than
the meanest jiggle. So do I. The only thing that can render it a reality
is love. I intended to say to you, let us end it. For two years, I have
borne the mask of a hypocrite that I might thus tell you of my idolatry,
and say give me love or die. This letter necessitates a change of
purpose. I welcome it as announcing that my sacrifice is
complete--inadequate in comparison with the one you made in uniting
yourself to me, but all that I have to give. It is requisite that I must
yet live to do others justice--to provide for our children; although
they have been valueless to me since I knew that their souls were not
links between ours.
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