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Howells, William Dean, 1837-1920

"The Minister's Charge"


Berry invented these axioms apparently to put himself in heart; in
the abstract he was already courageous enough. He said that these
Eastern girls were not used to having any sort of attention; that
there was only about a tenth or fifteenth of a fellow to every girl,
and that it tickled one of them to death to have a whole man around.
He was not meanly exultant at their destitution. He said he just
wished one of these pretty Boston girls--nice, well dressed,
cultured, and brought up to be snubbed and neglected by the tenths
and fifteenths of men they had at home--could be let loose in the
West, and have a regular round-up of fellows. Or, no, he would like
to have about five thousand fellows from out there, that never
expected a woman to look at them, unloaded in Boston, and see them
open their eyes. "Wouldn't one of 'em get home alive, if kindness
could kill 'em. I never saw such a place! I can't get used to it! It
makes me tired. _Any_ sort of fellow could get married in Boston!"
Berry made no attempt to reconcile his uncertainty as to his own
chances with this general theory, but he urged it to prove that Miss
Swan and Miss Carver would like to have Lemuel call; he said they
had both said they wished they could paint him. He had himself
sustained various characters in costume for them, and one night he
pretended that they had sent him down for Lemuel to help out with a
certain group.


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