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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Heartbreak House"

Randall: I will not allow it. I simply will not allow it.
You had no right to discuss me with Hector. I will not be
discussed by men.
HECTOR. Be reasonable, Ariadne. Your fatal gift of beauty forces
men to discuss you.
LADY UTTERWORD. Oh indeed! what about YOUR fatal gift of beauty?
HECTOR. How can I help it?
LADY UTTERWORD. You could cut off your moustache: I can't cut off
my nose. I get my whole life messed up with people falling in
love with me. And then Randall says I run after men.
RANDALL. I--
LADY UTTERWORD. Yes you do: you said it just now. Why can't you
think of something else than women? Napoleon was quite right when
he said that women are the occupation of the idle man. Well, if
ever there was an idle man on earth, his name is Randall
Utterword.
RANDALL. Ariad--
LADY UTTERWORD [overwhelming him with a torrent of words]. Oh yes
you are: it's no use denying it. What have you ever done? What
good are you? You are as much trouble in the house as a child of
three. You couldn't live without your valet.
RANDALL. This is--
LADY UTTERWORD. Laziness! You are laziness incarnate. You are
selfishness itself. You are the most uninteresting man on earth.
You can't even gossip about anything but yourself and your
grievances and your ailments and the people who have offended
you.


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