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Various

"Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, January 23, 1892"


[Illustration]
Shyness is a fine qualification in a Social Duffer, and it is greatly
improved by shortness, and, as one may say, stupidity of sight. I
never recognise anyone whom I know; on the other hand, I frequently
recognise people whom I never saw before in my life, and salute them
with a heartiness which they fail to appreciate. Once, at an evening
party, where the Princess BERGSTOL was present, a lady, who had
treated me with hospitable kindness, I three times mistook her; once
for an eminent novelist, once for a distinguished philanthropist,
and once for an admired female performer on the Banjo. I carried
on conversations with her in each of these three imaginary
characters,--and I ask you, is this the way to shine in Society?
You may say, "Wear spectacles"--but they are unbecoming. As to an
eye-glass, somehow it irritates people even more than mere blindness
does. Besides, it is always dropping into one's soup.
People are always accosting me, people who seem vaguely familiar, and
then I have to make believe very much that I remember them, and to
wait for casual hints.


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